By: Frank Hyden
RAW was Legends Nights and it featured some old faces, some dumb bullshit, and some pretty good stuff. Let’s get to the rundown.
UGLY- Opening segment with Hulk Hogan, Miz and Morrison, and New Day
The show started with some dumb segment with Hulk Hogan and a cell phone. I couldn’t make out all that was being said because of course somebody here (not naming names) had to ask me some question that was unrelated to anything going on and she couldn’t have done that 5 minutes ago when we were talking before the show. Whatever it was, it looked stupid.
Things got worse, though, a lot worse when the show opened with Miz TV. Miz and John Morrison did the carnival barker type of opening, hyping up all the legends being there. That was fine, it was corny because they did the usual impressions of Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan. But that’s what you expect, though, that’s what you want.
This is where it got bad. The New Day came out, as they were the guests. They did some crap where they acted as if they were the hosts and asked a bunch of stupid questions. The annoying part came when Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods started screaming AT THE TOP OF THEIR FUCKING LUNGS. Am I watching WWE or some shitty YouTuber screaming like a little bitch? Some of this is surely my inner old man but JFC this is fucking ridiculous. I tweeted that surely there were people changing the channel because of this. It’s cringe bullshit, I’m not an 8 year old kid.
Anyway, Miz yelled at them and then Teddy Long came out and made it a tag match because of course he did. Thanks for showing up, Teddy. What a shit beginning. I didn’t care for the cliffhanger ending last week with Randy Orton and Alexa Bliss, partly because it stretches kayfabe way too far and partly because I hated the POV angle (again, because of kayfabe) but they could at least start with that because we saw a man about to FUCKING MURDER SOMEONE.
GOOD/BAD- The New Day beat Miz and Morrison
The match was fine, though I was soured on it because of the previous segment. Miz and Morrison should have won, they’ve lost so damn much that it’s almost a running gag. Moving on…
GOOD- AJ Styles beat Elias
There were some more Legends stuff. Angel Garza (newly crowned 24/7 Champion) gave Mickie James a rose as Tatanka and Sgt. Slaughter looked on. Slaughter called Gaza “Puke” and then “Maggot”. I thought that was kind of funny. Randy Orton also cut a promo and talked about how he didn’t set Bliss on fire last week. He talked about hating himself and directing that towards others. It was okay, good for Orton, but just okay. The Styles-Elias match was good in that they’re talented guys. Yeah, there’s not a great reason for them to be feuding but that’s all right. Styles won and is also entering the Royal Rumble.
GOOD/BAD- Peyton Royce and Lacey Evans beat Charlotte Flair and Asuka
Charlotte dominated, as always. She’s the female Roman Reigns, or he’s the male Charlotte Flair, whichever you prefer. Point is, it’s the same stuff with her. She’s obviously very talented and is one of the best workers they have. It would just be nice if she didn’t steamroll her opponents every time. The real BAD part comes from some stuff with Ric Flair. Evans was flirting with Ric before and during the match. I liked that, as it’s a way for Evans to get under the skin of Charlotte. The problem was the finish saw Ric grab Charlotte’s foot so she fell and got pinned. The way he did it looked completely on purpose, but I’m guessing it was supposed to look like an accident, that he meant to grab the opponent’s foot. You give Ric a little pass there because of his health but also because then Charlotte got in Ric’s face and belittled him and trashed him. Which kind of tells me that it was supposed to be an accident. But then I started thinking that maybe they’re going to have Ric turn on Charlotte. That wouldn’t make any sense, though, because you can already see coming a mile away that Charlotte is going to turn on Asuka soon. So it wouldn’t make any sense to have Ric turn on Charlotte, then Charlotte turn on Asuka. But this is WWE, though…
GOOD- Riddle beat Bobby Lashley
For some reason, they’ve dropped the Matt from Riddle. Which is dumb, but anyway. This was a pretty good match, no surprise. Lashley got Riddle in The Hurt Lock but Riddle swung his legs around, which made the ref duck and miss Riddle tapping. This time, Lashley released the hold when he was supposed to (rather than hanging on like he usually does) but the ref continued the match, allowing Riddle to roll up Lashley and get the win. MVP and Lashley were outraged.
GOOD/BAD- Dana Brooke beat Shayna Baszler
This was supposed to be Mandy Rose vs. Baszler but Baszler attacked Rose before the bell. That brought out Brooke, who pinned Baszler while in the Kirifuda Clutch. I don’t like Baszler losing as she should be the top heel on whichever show she’s on, but this was a good way to book it. The real problem is the match was really short.
GOOD- Randy Orton beat Jeff Hardy
This match was fine. They did more ear stuff with Orton’s fingers actually in the holes in Hardy’s lobes. The finish was the Twist of Fate into the RKO spot that always looks good.
GOOD- Lucha House Party beat The Hurt Business
Cedric Alexander and Shelton Benjamin had issues and that allowed LHP to get the win. They argued afterwards, with MVP in the middle. Short match, but effective in the story of Alexander and Benjamin having issues.
GOOD- Drew McIntyre beat Keith Lee to defend his WWE World Championship
They went back and forth with some big moves. Lee hit McIntyre with The Pounce and sent him flying over the barrier. Later, McIntyre powerbombed Lee through the announce table, with Lee hitting the corner of the table first. Ouch. Lee did a Spanish Fly off the top rope, which looked really dangerous and really cool but really suffered from the whole “no room on the top rope” thing so they gingerly got up there and were clearly holding each other up. Better to go from the second rope instead. Maybe not for that move, but in general. McIntyre finally won with the Claymore after more back and forth. This was a good match that I liked. Afterwards, Goldberg came out and challenged McIntyre for the title at Royal Rumble. McIntyre said that would be like facing his dad so Goldberg shoved him down as the show ended. A good way to end the show. Goldberg vs. McIntyre won’t be to everyone’s liking but the Royal Rumble matches themselves are the draw for those shows, so those who don’t like it aren’t hurt and those who do like it are potential added fans.
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